The Chelsea Curve – “The Chelsea Curve”
So the turkey burger in my freezer is always complaining about me “putting it down” to thaw out in the regular refrigerator part.
“Why are you always putting us down?” it complains to me.
As a reasonable sort, I try to get along with everyone. No matter where on the food chain you happen to fall.
“I don’t mean to be derogatory or disrespectful in any manner!” I say in my defense to the turkey burger.
“If I could eat you by taking you from the refrigerator and then placing you in the freezer, uplifting you, you might say- I would gladly do so.”
This is usually followed by low grumblings and faint profanities uttered by the turkey burger.
But, I’m a busy man. I mean, I have music reviews to attend to. And though it might seem to you that you have, inadvertently, tuned into the Cooking Channel- I’m in the midst of a review right now.
So strike all that. Press “select all” and “delete” all of this in your mind this very second. Let’s forget all this unrelated ramblings of a seemingly, lost soul caught in the lair of alcohol abuse with just a press of a finger
or two.
This brings us finally to- The Chelsea Curve.
All I know is I know little about a lot of things and a lot about hardly anything. And all I know about this band is they’re playing soon with my favorite band, The Little River Band.
Press “select all” and “delete” on those last four words.
(Editor’s note: What app can I get to apply this to Slimedog?)
I meant to say, my fave new glam/garage/Gregorian chant/punk band The Baabes.
The Chelsea Curve describe themselves with tags such as melodic punk, mod pop, power pop and I tag them also, with the spunk and grit of punk along with some gorgeous, great pop melodies and some great lyrics too.
So let us cast our worries to the wind, put the meat of the discussion on the table and listen to these great tunes:
Lyricist Linda Pardee says- “This song (“Inconceivable”) came about when I was trying to find a five-syllable word to fit the rhythm of the song and ended up making fun of myself for it.”
The verse goes: “Look at her! She thinks she’s so damn brilliant, uses big words with five syllables! It’s inconceivable she understands them all! Does she know? Inexplicable?”
The wonderful chorus then explodes with pure, pop perfection- “No, she doesn’t get it. Ba ba da! Ba! Baaa!” which makes me think of Talking Heads “Psycho Killer”. “But she doesn’t sweat it. It’s inconceivable.”
This song mixes the best of sixties pop with the best of early melodic punk and new wave.
“People say she’s such a pompous ass, you know. And such a faker. Disingenuous!”
To me, it’s inconceivable that anyone would not love a song as melodically great and fun as I believe this song to be.
“Drag” starts out with a terrific, trebly bass that recalls Joy Division to me, then springs out with the words, “I am an eternal optimist. Something like a freakin’ love octopus. Eight arms to hold you. Eight arms to knock you out.”
And when the music arrives all bright and brash and the words say, “When you’ve think you’ve seen it all before. Everything and everyone’s at war”
And how true is that? And then the glorious pop chorus comes in like honey dripping down upon your soul with the proclamation- “And everything is such a drag! Draggermost, sad almost. We gonna be okay?”
But the music is so joyous and uplifting that we know that the answer must be “Yes!”
If not for the turkey burger- at least, for me. ‘Cause with a song so lively and great as this it just makes me feel that all good will win out, eventually.
As I listen to this song I have tears in my eyes, happiness in my heart with my limbs flailing, dancing about and Hey! Hey! This is one of the best songs I’ve heard all year. (Okay!)
“All In Time” is one poppin’, boppin’ bodacious tune that barrels forward filled with energy, excitement and enthusiasm.
“Anything you can read about. Anything you can dream about. Anything you can’t live without- it’s your mind.”
Well, for me that’s songs that are as great as this one.
So after a more subdued and calm discussion with the turkey burger, who BTW loves The Chelsea Curve- which did surprise me, because- though the turkey burger tastes very good with some shredded cheese and some BBQ sauce slathered upon it- it usually has terrible taste in music.
How can I explain it? It’s music taste is like, “I took a Journey on my REO Speedwagon from The Styx with Toto along with a Foreigner to Boston.”
So vegan or vacant, whether you’re into hardcore punk or soft-core pop.
I feel there is something of worth, something of great substance, something more fulfilling and life sustaining in The Chelsea Curve that should not be distracted from by some whining substitute meat form, and by
that I refer to myself- not the turkey burger.
For me, The Chelsea Curve really agrees with my taste, my appetite.
Just grab a bite and see if you agree.
(Slimedog)
