McGunks / Iron Chin / The F.U.’s / The Struggle
Midway Cafe, Jamaica Plain, MA 4/9/16
As many of you are aware of, we recently ran into trouble for breaking the laws of facebook by having TNB as a person with friends. We entered counseling because of this, did countless community hours of service. But the result of this was, one of us had to serve seven years of hard labor in a Kentucky state prison institution. Since I, almost weekly, do live reviews- Andy graciously took the rap as he is still able to do his on-line duties from jail.
Occasionally, Andy does get furlough and it was at this recent event- The Sixth Annual Hardcore Cotillion put on by the lovely and charming Carrie Ford, manager/Mother figure to BarRoom Heroes, that- he was able to attend, accompanied with heavily armed guards. So as always, sit back and relax, try to erase all thoughts of scenes of ballroom prison shower dancing from your mind as we enter the strange and alluring world of Dual Texting.
Slimedog- How is Kentucky?
Andy- Well, the bourbon is good…
Slimedog- Oh, I was unaware that they allowed drinking in prison. You are doing that seven years of hard labor there?
Andy- Yes. We have a pipeline that enables us to get anything we want. I can actually probably get you a few hard to find items. If you know what I mean.
Slimedog- Hmm, well if I couldn’t get alcohol on the outside I would probably be breaking into jail. What did you tell them this time to get your furlough?
Andy- I told them my spleen had ruptured and I needed to get a new one.
Slimedog- Excellent. You have no worry about rupturing anything today as it’s a Cotillion. A sort of dance. Therefore there will be no moshing but ballroom dancing instead.
Andy- Cool. I just learned ballroom dancing in the prison men’s room.
Slimedog- Great. I suppose it’s always a problem though with who will lead?
Andy- Nobody really leads. More of a prehistoric sword fight since nobody wants to turn their backs on their partner.
Slimedog- Hmm, naked drunken sword fights is not what TNB stands for, or… maybe it is. So I gather you’re here in the hope of being crowned King of the Cotillion?
Andy- Well maybe. I think I can hold my own. Provided nobody else tries to. In prison, usually the biggest guy gets to hold whatever he wants.
Slimedog- Well I’m of the thought that you should never bite off more than you can chew. The first band just started playing, they’re called The Struggle.
Andy- Oh, I almost forgot we’re at a show. Hey these guys are rocking it with cool hardcore goodness.
Slimedog- I see Brian on drums from Reason To Fight and Chad on guitar from Beantown Boozehounds and Taxi Driver. Plus, Bill the photographer. This is a pure hardcore band. Check out their cover of “Alcohol” by GangGreen.
Andy- I really like these guys. It’s good to see some new blood in the scene.
Slimedog- Agreed. Now it’s time for real old-school hardcore with The F.U.’s
Andy- But in this case, old school is new school since the FU’s are just as relevant today as they were 30 years ago.
Slimedog- Great stuff, short songs that end abruptly with jerky rhythms. And the fairly new bassist and guitar player seem to fit in nicely.
Andy- Yes, it’s quite exciting to see the FU’s keepin’ on.
Slimedog- This is one of their best sets by them that I’ve seen recently. Look there’s Blowfish and Ms. Lyn from (bostongroupienews.com). They did one of the original Boston punk fanzines and they’re back on-line covering a lot of the same bands that we do. But, of course, they did it first.
Andy- Indubitably. The FU’s are always a good bet as are the folks from BGN.
Slimedog- Now, Iron Chin is set to play. I saw them once before and I described them as metal/Oi. What’s your take on them?
Andy- Well I don’t think they really fit into the hardcore bucket. I’d say they’re more garage rock-ish.
Slimedog- It says on their facebook that they’re influenced by the same genres we cover but they sound to me like a hard rock band. Excellent at what they do but not really my thing. Oh look, now they’re announcing the King and Queen of the Cotillion.
Andy- Hey you and Jill (Midway bartenderess) have won. Wow, I think they want you guys to perform weird sex acts on stage.
Slimedog- Damn! And I left my penis at home. I know you’re kind of disappointed in not winning but running to the mens room in tears is not very good for our hardcore/metal image.
Andy- Hey piss off, I just had something in my eye. Anyway, it’s time for the last band of the afternoon- the amazing McGunks!
Slimedog- Their show last December with The Boozehounds was my pick for show of last year. And they have a great lineup today with Bobby on drums, Nate on guitar and Peter back on bass.
Andy- Yes. I’m not quite sure of the genre these guys fall into, but they’re always exciting, always awesome and always fun for all.
Slimedog- I heard the term “punk’n’roll” first from them and I feel they fit that term perfectly. Hey they’re playing “Ace Of Spades” by Motorhead. I’m gonna join them on stage.
Andy- Ok, I think I’ll go fix my mascara in the alt-sex bathroom…
Slimedog- That was fun. Some of the folks were making fun of my King’s hat so I had them beheaded. I figured why not? Though I do feel bad for the untold pain and suffering I will cause their families.
Andy- As my Aunt Nonna used to say, “Fuck ’em.” They probably would of died of some natural causes down the road anyway.
Slimedog- Well I guess it’s time for you to return to your bathroom, bourbon, bashes.
Andy- You’re probably right. I’ve been sitting down a bit too comfortably anyway. I’ll let you know when my next furlough is.
Slimedog- Oh and here’s a spleen I took from one of the beheaded. You can show it to your warden.
Andy- Cool. I’ll reattach it in the car. Now, as they say, I think it’s time we go in through the out door.
(After this event took place Slimedog was stripped of his crown as it was revealed that he was, in fact, born in Bavaria.)
