Urban Waste / F.U.’s / USA Waste / A Dying Breed / Empty Vessels / The Nasty / Red Line Rebels / Red Tape
Firehouse 13, Providence, RI 3/24/13
We recently had the pleasure of seeing a show at the Firehouse, which is an actual functioning firehouse with Firemen and spotted Dalmatians running about. It’s really great they let us have punk shows there and don’t seem to mind too much when they don’t notice the alarm is going off until a band finishes a song.
So again this is Slimedog and Bang conducting a dual texting review, live and as it happens, using the utmost in space age technology. And again, when it comes to texting, leave that to the professionals. Sure, if you’re driving on the expressway, flying an airplane or flying a train well then- text away! But do not attempt this in a club. I have witnessed beer spilled- so be forewarned.
Now just sit back and relax, allow us to create a vortex of pleasure that will enter your mind and send shock waves down your spine as we enter, once again, into the chilling, thrilling, death defying world of dual texting.
Slimedog- Well, today we’re at The Firehouse which is good because today’s lineup is so scorching hot they may set the place on fire.
Andy- And in beautiful downtown Providence no less. Perhaps a little fire would be good for this part of town.
Slimedog- Hopefully the firemen will save this place as it’s a great club.
Andy- And the Mickey D’s next door as well. I am very impressed with the sound in the Firehouse. It has very good acoustics.
Slimedog- Good stage as well which Red Tape have just descended upon.
Andy- I think Red Tape is amazing. They definitely play well beyond their combined years.
Slimedog- It’s scary how good their drummer is and their new CD is great.
Andy- Also they bring lots of fans with them, which doesn’t hurt.
Slimedog- Looks like Barry White is taking the stage.
Andy- I don’t think that’s Barry White, I think it’s Barry Manilow.
Slimedog- No we’re both wrong. It’s Jay Genoa from the Red Line Rebels. He looks exactly like Barry.
Andy- It must be Jay since neither Barry plays with silly string. Speaking of Jay,, the Red Lines are sounding exceptionally well tonight.
Slimedog- Yes and the tossing around of devil dogs during the set is a great metaphor for the existential plight of mankind and modern life.
Andy- True, but try not to get any of that nasty cream in your eye.
Slimedog- Isn’t it odd that every band so far has had ‘Red’ in the name? Next up is The Nasty Reds.
Andy- The nasty red what’s?
Slimedog- Just The Nasty Reds. They’re from New Hampshire and are fairly new to us.
Andy- Ah, The Nasty Red New Hampshirites. Well whatever they’re called they sound very good.
Slimedog- They say they play a mixture of thrash and hardcore. I describe their sound as one part Stooges garage punk and one part hardcore. Now it’s time for the Empty Red Vessels.
Andy- Yes, and something completely different. Lots of interesting things going on with these folks, but wow does it work.
Slimedog- I think it’s so mean that the other bands make them play on the floor. But I agree- metal, punk, noise and hardcore meet and wrestle to a draw.
Andy- Maybe the mosh pit should move to the stage when they play. (Andy decides to try diving onto the stage)
Slimedog- Yeah, but it was unwise of you to stage dive into the drum set. They sound great as always but I am greatly disappointed there is no beige kitty on guitarist Allison’s amp anymore. (Cat joined another band it seems). I hope no one notices the tears rolling down my cheeks.
Andy- We’d better take a quick break to get ourselves sorted out. Let’s hit Mickey D’s.
Slimedog- Fine dining to complement this fine music. We have to be back soon for A Dying Red Breed though.
Andy- Cool.
(Interlude while sentimental violin music plays)
Andy- Looks like we got back just in time to see them.
Slimedog- I think this band is more your speed, a mix of metal and hardcore.
Andy- True, they have a nice bite to them. Hey, Mousey (vocalist) from Reason To Fight has joined in on the fun.
Slimedog- I do like how their singer makes me think of Handsome Dick Manitoba from the Dictators which is always a good thought. Now USA Red Waste is getting ready to play.
Andy- Sounds like something I’d flush after eating too much chili. But I really like these guys. Not sure the sound guy is doing them justice though. Maybe he’s getting tired.
Slimedog- These guys are mainly from Maine and play quirky, high energy hardcore. This is the best I’ve seen them. My favorite set of the night.
Andy- Unless my memory fails me, my favorite performance by them was at Radio. Looks like The Red F.U.’s are up next and they brought an extra guitar player.
Slimedog- I think you mean The Red F.U. Waste, I believe. Yes, Steve, one of the original guitarists, is up from Texas.
Andy- Hmm, based on the sound check, looks like the sound man has finally gone deaf. He seems to be going for a burst ear drum.
Slimedog- Yeah, we love this band especially when Steve is on board, but tonight the soundboard is killing them. Now it’s time for Red Urban Waste, but I think we’d better go before brain damage sets in.
Andy- Yes, unfortunately the decibel level has ruptured my right ear drum and blood is spewing from my ear. Luckily I’ve saved a french fry from Micky D’s and used it to temporarily stop the bleeding.
Slimedog- Oh I was thinking that was ketchup running down your face. I must say it’s very tasty with my fries. Let me just add that we’ve seen Red Urban Waste several times before and they’re an old New York hardcore band from Agnostic Front days. They’re always great.
(Andy Bang takes one step towards the exit and suddenly passes out onto the floor in a pool of blood, ketchup and french fries)
